I think it is time, with all the modern and technologically-advanced features that come on new cars — backup cameras, side-curtain airbags, tush massagers — that we start requiring one more addition: the factory-installed dent. Don’t you think? Let’s make it standard on every new vehicle. Or better yet, right after you sign-off on the paperwork and hand the dealership a check, they should offer you a ball-peen hammer so you can go outside and ceremoniously put the first ding in your brand new auto. The inaugural ding.
Attack of the new car bells and whistles
To buy a new car or not to buy a new car? That is Shakespeare’s great cliché … I mean struggle. Because I don’t really want a new car. And I don’t entirely need one. But it’s beginning to look like that’s the future. Yeesh! I don’t drive all that much. A trip to the grocery store is a long journey for me. The mileage on my cars is so low that mechanics wonder how I managed to roll back the digital odometers.