\u201cDad!\u201d pounced the kid as I walked in the door for lunch. \u201cReady to do some science experiments?\u201d<\/p>\n
Ambushed is more like it. Was it even at the door? Maybe it was out by the front gate. She jumped me from the bushes like some kind of jungle cat. <\/p>\n
\u201cCome on. Let\u2019s get to work!\u201d<\/p>\n
I didn\u2019t even have time to put my keys down before I was dragged off. <\/p>\n
Pop was in town. That\u2019s my dad. He went shopping. \u201cI hope it\u2019s OK,\u201d he said. <\/p>\n
I came in to find a mad scientist\u2019s den. That\u2019s what the science kit was called. \u201cExtreme Secret Experiments Inside!\u201d the booklet said on the cover. <\/p>\n
There were little beakers and test tubes with colored liquid in them. White powder in packages. Eye droppers. Funnels. My daughter had a pair of goggles. There was a giant monster with a flat head hooked up to wires on a gurney. OK, maybe not that. <\/p>\n
My dad smiled. It was the kind of smile that said, \u201cSorry \u2026 but this is really funny as hell!\u201d<\/p>\n
Funny for YOU! You get to leave. I get to clean the exploding volcano off the ceiling and figure out why the dog is coughing up blue bubbles. <\/p>\n
\u201cDad! Dad!\u201d barked my daughter. She sounded like a seal. \u201cWant to make slime? Glowing alien slime! oooOOOooohhh! What color slime do you want to make?\u201d<\/p>\n
Here\u2019s what lunch is to me: A chance to come home. Unwind. Read The Wall Street Journal. Learn about the wider world while totally ignoring the closer world. Lunch is that time when I go into what I refer to as a \u201cconscious coma.\u201d <\/p>\n
I don\u2019t make slime. Or \u201cLemony Invisible Ink.\u201d Or \u201cBread in a Tube.\u201d Or \u201cPlastic Rotten Milk,\u201d whetever the heck that is. Do you even need a science kit to make that!<\/p>\n
But I realized something as I considered shaking the kid off: Ain\u2019t got much of this left. This youthful exuberance. This ants-in-the-pants excitement to see me walk in the door. This lightning-charged need to be with me. The child is already 8. Ain\u2019t got much of this left. <\/p>\n
These are the moments you don\u2019t squander. Opportunities you don\u2019t pass up. I learned that from my dad. When he used to come home with science kits and other assorted thingamajiggers that took hours of patience and attention. That you find the time and the mental strength no matter how badly that couch is calling you. <\/p>\n
You do it and you enjoy it. That\u2019s your fatherly duty. <\/p>\n
\u201cGREEN slime,\u201d I said. \u201cAlien slime should always be green.\u201d \t<\/p>\n
\u201cGood point,\u201d she said. \u201cI\u2019ll get the food coloring.\u201d <\/p>\n
On the stove something exploded. The dog coughed up blue bubbles. I swore I heard a hissing beaker whisper, \u201cHELP ME!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cEh! Who cares?\u201d I said, putting my Wall Street Journal down and heading into the mad scientist\u2019s den. It was time to get to work. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
\u201cDad!\u201d pounced the kid as I walked in the door for lunch. \u201cReady to do some science experiments?\u201d Ambushed is more like it. Was it even at the door? Maybe it was out by the front gate. She jumped me from the bushes like some kind of jungle cat. \u201cCome on. Let\u2019s get to work!\u201d I didn\u2019t even have time to put my keys down before I was dragged off. Pop was in town. That\u2019s my dad. He went shopping. \u201cI hope it\u2019s OK,\u201d he said. I came in to find a mad scientist\u2019s den. That\u2019s what the science kit was called. \u201cExtreme Secret Experiments Inside!\u201d the booklet said on the cover. There were little beakers and test tubes with colored liquid in them. White powder in packages. Eye droppers. Funnels. My daughter had a pair of goggles. There was a giant monster with a flat head hooked up to wires on a gurney. OK, maybe not that. My dad smiled. It was the kind of smile that said, \u201cSorry \u2026 but this is really funny as hell!\u201d Funny for YOU! You get to leave. I get to clean the exploding volcano off the ceiling and figure out why the dog is coughing up blue bubbles. \u201cDad! Dad!\u201d barked my daughter. She sounded like a seal. \u201cWant to make slime? Glowing alien slime! oooOOOooohhh! What color slime do you want to make?\u201d Here\u2019s what lunch is to me: A chance to come home. Unwind. Read The Wall Street Journal. Learn […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[543,8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1190","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-2014-nutshells","category-parenthoodandchildren"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1190","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1190"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1190\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1191,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1190\/revisions\/1191"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1190"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1190"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1190"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}