Goodbye daylight savings time. We were getting along so well, then you turned your back and walked away.
\n
\nYou do it every year. Why? Is it something we said? Do you have somewhere to go? Some other friends to go play with? We\u2019re not bad people and we make good conversation. <\/p>\n
Sit down, stay a while, stay the whole year. No one\u2019s using the bed in the guestroom. We\u2019ll make it up special for you. <\/p>\n
I love daylight savings time, and hate losing it each year. I don\u2019t like it getting dark early, especially when I\u2019m out running. Strange as this may seem, I often worry not about getting hit by a car, but that I will be chased by a pack of territorial raccoon street thugs with rabies. It could happen. <\/p>\n
And I don\u2019t like changing all the clocks, which never goes very well. <\/p>\n
I\u2019ve got approximately 300 clocks, watches and assorted devices that need to be adjusted each year, and it takes me weeks to discover them all. <\/p>\n
And even when I know where they are, I never change them all at once. Instead, I change just a couple, say the kitchen clock, a watch and my alarm clock. I go about my business, have breakfast and, just to make this a much more enjoyable experience, totally forget which clocks I changed. <\/p>\n
Now, a wise man would think, \u201cOh, those are the ones running an hour later.\u201d But I\u2019m not a wise man. I\u2019m a confused man with a bad sense of time, and I can\u2019t remember which way I set them. <\/p>\n
By the time I\u2019m through, it\u2019s clearly the middle of the day, yet my clocks are reading 6 a.m. I\u2019m in the kitchen fixing eggs and grits, and people from work keep calling me. \u201cHow dare you call me this early in the morning,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n
The night of the change, I literally had to wake my wife up to ask her which way to set the clocks. <\/p>\n
\u201cIs it back or forward?\u201d I asked her. \u201cAnd if it\u2019s back, which way is that? And what time is it now, anyway?\u201d<\/p>\n
I had already spent an hour with graph paper, a calculator and a book on algebra trying to figure it out. \u201cSo if you fall back, you take the square root of now, multiply it by the time it is in Kansas City and subtract the three-hour mistake I made last year and lived with for six months.\u201d<\/p>\n
Eventually I figure out what time it really is, but it doesn\u2019t get any easier. Now I have to figure out how to change all those clocks that don\u2019t have knobs and dials, but digital readouts and buttons. In my Jeep, the stereo has an 84-step process for adjusting the clock. And get one press of the buttons wrong and it drains the oil and activates the internal self-destruct mechanism. <\/p>\n
Most digital clocks have buttons to change the time that don\u2019t come marked. Why the mystery? Why can\u2019t they be clearly marked? Why do you need a decoder ring and an Indian Jones-style adventure to figure it out? <\/p>\n
\u201cIf I hold the staff of Ambeeza at a 45-degree angle, a ray of light from the sun will flash across the room illuminating the secret time-changing button \u2026 or activate the internal self-destruct mechanism.\u201d<\/p>\n
Beginning in 2007, there will be an extra couple weeks of daylight savings time. It\u2019s all being done in the name of saving electricity. Saving electricity? That\u2019s not why you do it! It\u2019s so you can play later into the evening and run when the raccoons aren\u2019t out. <\/p>\n
And most of all, it\u2019s to have a little extra time to not worry about how in the heck to change all those clocks, and which way to change them. Honey, which way was that again? <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Goodbye daylight savings time. We were getting along so well, then you turned your back and walked away.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-2"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=16"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=16"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=16"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=16"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}