My wife has been talking about the hard water here in Northeast Florida and how bad it is for your skin and hair. Apparently, your hair gets frizzy and falls out, and your skin begins to look like a cross between a Nevada dessert and a molting lizard. All because of various mineral deposits and lime scale and a host of other things that sound totally made up by infomercial \u201cscientists.\u201d But I wouldn\u2019t say that in public because I don\u2019t want to sleep on the sofa. <\/p>\n
Oops!<\/p>\n
I\u2019m a dutiful husband, though, and I certainly don\u2019t want to look like a molting lizard or the Nevada dessert, especially after a night of sleeping on the couch. So, when she forwarded me an article about water filters for showers that take out bad stuff and help to rejuvenate your body and hair, I did some research, feigned interest and actually bought one.<\/p>\n
\u201cI ordered the shower filter,\u201d I told her. <\/p>\n
\u201cOh goodie!\u201d she said clapping like a seal. \u201cDid you get the one with the Vitamin C infused ceramic beads and the micro luffa sponges and the seaweed extract that turns chlorine into butterscotch candy?\u201d
\n<\/p>\n
\u201cUm \u2026 yeah \u2026 let me go check …\u201d <\/p>\n
Yeah, I did no such thing. I actually ordered the filter that adds more chlorine to water, along with a little roofing tar and some other hazardous chemicals that turns your toenails green. So, let me just quickly cancel that order and replace it with \u2013 BINGO! \u2014 the 12-stage filter she wanted. <\/p>\n
\u201cYep, definitely ordered the right one. Has the frou-frou Vitamin C seaweed extract butterscotch candy thing-y.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh goodie!\u201d <\/p>\n
It came in the mail. I installed it. The water came out, and as luck would have it, I got to take the first shower. <\/p>\n
And, I\u2019ve got to tell you \u2026 my skin, hair and even NAILS feel revitalized! I mean, fresh and new and rejuvenated. <\/p>\n
I bounded down the stairs spinning like a top. \u201cFeel my hair, everybody!\u201d I told my wife and daughter. \u201cJust FEEL it! It\u2019s luxurious and soft and SILKY!!! Like a pampered French poodle bathed in orange juice and olive oil. And my skin and nails? Well, my nails still look like they\u2019ve been through a wheat thresher, but you can\u2019t expect miracles after one wash!\u201d<\/p>\n
Truth is, I need a little help. I\u2019m getting up there in years, and what no one ever told me is \u201cup there in years\u201d really means your body goes downtown. I have eyebrows the length of pine trees, strange islands of hair sprouting in the most awkward of places, and for the first time in my life, I would describe myself as \u201clumpy.\u201d I look like a bowl of porridge. <\/p>\n
It prompts my 12-year-old to say things like this: \u201cDon\u2019t take offense: You\u2019re supposed to be hairy.\u201d Then she recoils from me with a sickened shiver.
\nMaybe this new shower filter and its newfangled Vitamin C infusion will do me some good. Although I should probably trade out the filter that prevents hair loss with one that washes it ALL away. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
My wife has been talking about the hard water here in Northeast Florida and how bad it is for your skin and hair. Apparently, your hair gets frizzy and falls out, and your skin begins to look like a cross between a Nevada dessert and a molting lizard. All because of various mineral deposits and lime scale and a host of other things that sound totally made up by infomercial \u201cscientists.\u201d But I wouldn\u2019t say that in public because I don\u2019t want to sleep on the sofa. Oops! I\u2019m a dutiful husband, though, and I certainly don\u2019t want to look like a molting lizard or the Nevada dessert, especially after a night of sleeping on the couch. So, when she forwarded me an article about water filters for showers that take out bad stuff and help to rejuvenate your body and hair, I did some research, feigned interest and actually bought one. \u201cI ordered the shower filter,\u201d I told her. \u201cOh goodie!\u201d she said clapping like a seal. \u201cDid you get the one with the Vitamin C infused ceramic beads and the micro luffa sponges and the seaweed extract that turns chlorine into butterscotch candy?\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[573,561,557,563],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1774","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-2018-nutshells","category-family","category-getting-old-er-older","category-houses"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1774","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1774"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1774\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1775,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1774\/revisions\/1775"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1774"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1774"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1774"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}