{"id":1888,"date":"2019-02-13T13:29:54","date_gmt":"2019-02-13T17:29:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/?p=1888"},"modified":"2019-02-13T13:29:58","modified_gmt":"2019-02-13T17:29:58","slug":"the-what-in-the-world-was-i-thinking-quiz","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/?p=1888","title":{"rendered":"The ‘What in the world was I thinking?’ quiz"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

On the verge of my 46th<\/sup> birthday, as I ponder the meaning of time, and more importantly, whether I\u2019m wasting vast gobs of it on ridiculous and absurd endeavors, I have developed a self-help quiz that I like to call: What in the world was I thinking? It goes like this:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2022 \u2026 when I ordered a book on Alexander Hamilton that is as\nthick as a concrete block \u2026 and almost as heavy. I got another book on the\ngreat (wait, who was he again?) Founding Father for Christmas, but when I sat\ndown to read it the other night, I realized it was more of a \u201cHamilton for\nDummies\u201d version. Seeing as how I might be a dummy, but don\u2019t like to admit it\nin public, I snapped the book shut in disgust and said aloud, \u201cThis simply will\nNOT do!\u201d Then I ordered the authoritative, gold standard version \u2026 which just\nso happens to be 7-feet-tall and required two large men to deliver through my\ndoor. To turn a page, I stand on a step ladder and use a slightly damp mop to\nflip from the far edge. What in the world was I thinking? (And do I secretly go\nback and read the Dummies version?)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2022 \u2026 when I thought I could get a handle on my email problem.\nWhy didn\u2019t I try my hand at cheap, harness-able fission? Or maybe a warp drive\nfor space ships? A simple fool like me would at least have a shot at taming those.\nBut to crack email, something scientists and philosophers have been wrestling\nwith since the days of Aristotle?!? I must have gone mad. And all because I\nread a couple of blog posts talking about how you could \u201czero-out\u201d your inbox\nand use a system of elaborate folders and conjure up dark spirits from the\nunderworld who also happen to make great electronic filers and exceptional\ncustomer service representatives (when not dabbling in the dark arts or\ntorturing innocent souls.) What in the world was I thinking? (And do I just\nstart pretending that incredibly violent sneezes caused me to \u201caccidentally\u201d\nhit delete on ALL of my email?)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2022 \u2026 when I thought I should start doing push ups every day.\nThis was because when you measure the width of my chest, you actually come up\nwith a number that vacillates around minus-3\/8s of an inch. So, I took up\npushups in an attempt to add girth to my poor, anemic pecs. Great idea! Only,\ndo you know why pushups were invented? For one sole reason: To push-yourself-up\nquickly after falling out of a tree so no one ever notices. That\u2019s it! That\u2019s\nthe only reason! And you only need to be able to do one. Not 15. Not sets of 3.\nJust one. And if you don\u2019t climb trees, you don\u2019t even need to do that! What in\nthe world was I thinking? (And would it be easier to get one of those Superman\ncostumes with the blow-up pecs that I can wear underneath my shirt?)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2022 \u2026 when I thought that waking up at 5 a.m. in the morning\nto write self-help quizzes as a way to find meaning and better use of my time. What\nin the world was I thinking? (And who in the world is that Alexander Hamilton\nguy again?)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

On the verge of my 46th birthday, as I ponder the meaning of time, and more importantly, whether I\u2019m wasting vast gobs of it on ridiculous and absurd endeavors, I have developed a self-help quiz that I like to call: What in the world was I thinking? It goes like this:<\/p>\n

\u2022 \u2026 when I ordered a book on Alexander Hamilton that is as thick as a concrete block \u2026 and almost as heavy. I got another book on the great (wait, who was he again?) Founding Father for Christmas, but when I sat down to read it the other night, I realized it was more of a \u201cHamilton for Dummies\u201d version. Seeing as how I might be a dummy, but don\u2019t like to admit it in public, I snapped the book shut in disgust and said aloud, \u201cThis simply will NOT do!\u201d Then I ordered the authoritative, gold standard version \u2026 which just so happens to be 7-feet-tall and required two large men to deliver through my door. To turn a page, I stand on a step ladder and use a slightly damp mop to flip from the far edge. What in the world was I thinking? (And do I secretly go back and read the Dummies version?)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[575,557],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1888","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-2019-nutshells","category-getting-old-er-older"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1888","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1888"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1888\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1889,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1888\/revisions\/1889"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1888"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1888"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1888"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}