I\u2019m on to you dog, you wrinkled-brow dung weevil. I get what\nyou\u2019re doing. You and your ancestors. Centuries of evolving to this perfectly\neffective state. Diverging from your cousins, the wolves, thanks to a little\nmuscle in your forehead that gives you super powers. Able to mimic our human\nemotions, and prey on our generosity and gullible-ness and the fact that we\nfind woodland critters with personality utterly irresistible. Mirror images of us,\nbut like cartoon characters. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And we\u2019re suckers. We\u2019ll give you anything when you pull off\nthat wrinkled-brow cute stuff. Another snack. A spot in our bed. The keys to\nthe car. A place in the will. I once grilled you a steak with graham crackers\non top! <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But I\u2019m wise now, buddy. I\u2019m on to you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s thanks to new research I read about the other day.\nScientists studied the differences between dogs and wolves, and found that\nman\u2019s best friend has a special muscle along their noggins that allows them to\ndo an \u201cinner eyebrow raise.\u201d Wolves don\u2019t have it, and so they just look like\nthey\u2019re going to eat our faces when they stare at us. But dogs can raise their eyebrows,\nlooking super cute and even human-like \u2026 right before they eat our faces off. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Only, they don\u2019t have to eat us. Dogs learned over the\ncenturies that if they employ this muscle \u2013 the levator anguli oculi medialis\n(also known as the sad-puppy-dog-con-artist muscle) \u2013 they can get scraps of\nmeat, become part of the family and even scam the password to the family 401K. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Pull off those \u201cpuppy dog eyes\u201d and they would have us in\nthe palm of their paws. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s a wonderful tool. With it, they can convince us of all\nmanner of things. They wrinkle that brow and we\u2019ll believe anything. \u201cCat poop?\nNo, I didn\u2019t eat any cat poop. Do I LOOK like I\u2019m capable of eating cat poop?\u201d\nwrinkle brow, wrinkle brow, wrinkle brow way down \u2026 now WINK! \u201cLook closely \u2026 aren\u2019t\nI precious?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Nah, not you. You\u2019re such a good girl, my pretty little \u2026\nwait a minute \u2026 there\u2019s some of it still hanging out of your mouth!!!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Bamboozled. They know what they\u2019re doing. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I thought my dog got me. I thought she was thoughtful and\ninnocent and sad. Wrinkling her brow was like a sigh: Woe is me! \u201cThe only\nthing in life that can make me feel better is a cookie \u2026 and a steak with a\ngraham cracker on top.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Do dogs do it on purpose? Do they know what they\u2019re doing?\nIs there a manual and webinars teaching them how to hoodwink us with it? Is it\npart of a master plan to take over the world? <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Part of me wishes I had never read this study. That I still\nbelieved my dog was just an innocent soul with a cute personality, incapable of\nanything as deceptive and duplicitous as an eyebrow raise. Maybe she is. It\nmight not be her fault that she has this power to make me puppy putty. Although,\nI\u2019d rather be bamboozled by a brow than stared at like I\u2019m going to be dinner.\nAnd they sure are cute when they do it \u2026 even if I do find the car keys missing\nright afterward. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I\u2019m on to you dog, you wrinkled-brow dung weevil. I get what you\u2019re doing. You and your ancestors. Centuries of evolving to this perfectly effective state. Diverging from your cousins, the wolves, thanks to a little muscle in your forehead that gives you super powers. Able to mimic our human emotions, and prey on our generosity and gullible-ness and the fact that we find woodland critters with personality utterly irresistible. Mirror images of us, but like cartoon characters. <\/p>\n
And we\u2019re suckers. We\u2019ll give you anything when you pull off that wrinkled-brow cute stuff. Another snack. A spot in our bed. The keys to the car. A place in the will. I once grilled you a steak with graham crackers on top! <\/p>\n
But I\u2019m wise now, buddy. I\u2019m on to you. <\/p>\n
It\u2019s thanks to new research I read about the other day. Scientists studied the differences between dogs and wolves, and found that man\u2019s best friend has a special muscle along their noggins that allows them to do an \u201cinner eyebrow raise.\u201d Wolves don\u2019t have it, and so they just look like they\u2019re going to eat our faces when they stare at us. But dogs can raise their eyebrows, looking super cute and even human-like \u2026 right before they eat our faces off. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[575,555,572],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1943","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-2019-nutshells","category-animals","category-in-the-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1943","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1943"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1943\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1944,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1943\/revisions\/1944"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1943"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1943"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1943"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}