Don\u2019t jinx it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Whatever you do, DO NOT jinx it. Because for large parts of Florida, it\u2019s going pretty well. In a record hurricane season like no other, so far we are doing pretty \u2026 NO! Don\u2019t think it. Don\u2019t say it. Don\u2019t write it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s not going pretty well. It\u2019s going terrible. We\u2019re literally running out of storm names. The say we start using the Greek alphabet if we run through all the names. Which is crazy because who even knew the Greeks had their own alphabet? And when was the last time Greece was even threatened by a tropical cyclone? So, where do they get off getting to name our storms with their letters? That\u2019s crazy!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Personally, I think the areas most-at-risk should be allowed to do a write-in campaign to name them. Then we can get some really good names like: Little Swirly, \u2018Ole Crooked Tail or The One That Licked Us. How about \u201cTiger Chomp?\u201d Man, that would be good, wouldn\u2019t it? I would take a Tiger Chomp over a Vicky or a Zeta. Besides, Greek alphabet-named storms are going to sound like a bad frat party in the Atlantic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
OK, back on topic: Don\u2019t jinx it. Don\u2019t let it creep into your mind. Don\u2019t think we\u2019re in the clear. Don\u2019t you dare say, \u201cmaybe none are going to hit us this year.\u201d Ugh! I feel sick even typing that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We\u2019re just past the peak of hurricane season, and while we\u2019ve had five tropical cyclones in the Atlantic at the same time for the first time since the 1970s, it seems like Florida has had a bad case of body odor because they all seem to be politely curving away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSeem\u201d to be.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
You have to say things like \u201cthey seem to be,\u201d or else you jinx us and one comes. See? Don\u2019t do that!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We have to be careful. We have to continue to expect the worst. Because we\u2019ve gotten storms late into the season before. We\u2019ve taken our lumps the past couple of years, and we know the dangers of letting down our guard or thinking the worst is over.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In fact, if you want to be helpful, band with me and predict a storm WILL hit here. Nothing ruins the chances of something happening than trying to predict it. Shoots the odds all to heck. The universe has to abide by that. It won\u2019t put up good money on a bad bet. There is proven science to back me up on this. I\u2019m like 82 percent sure on this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So, in order to predict all these storms hitting, and thereby ruining the odds of them actually making a Florida landfall, I religiously watch hurricane \u201cfandom\u201d sites and wait for new hurricane models to come out. And I don\u2019t mean those simple \u201cspaghetti model\u201d tracks. No sir, I search out the raw forecast model runs as they come in, scanning through American and European models with their fancy graphics and pretty colors.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
They\u2019re filled with terminology that I know is important because I don\u2019t have any idea what it means. Works like: anomaly, normalize, potential vorticity, marine instability, ensemble, \u201cnot to be used by amateur weather junkies with wild theories about how \u2018predicting\u2019 storms will actually ward them off. That\u2019s just dumb.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
These things make no sense to me. But that\u2019s OK, because I have my own ways of interpreting the mass of data splayed out before me. For instance, a little swirly moving west toward Florida I will assume will continue west toward Florida, unless it turns north. In which case I will remark, \u201cHuh \u2026 That doesn\u2019t make sense. Bet this thing doesn\u2019t know what it\u2019s talking about. I\u2019m gonna\u2019 go eat some of my canned chicken hurricane rations and see if it changes.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Or if I see a forecast model show a high pressure ridge weaken over the Atlantic, allowing a storm to turn out to sea. I will think, \u201cHuh \u2026 That doesn\u2019t make sense. Whenever I\u2019m faced with a hurricane, my pressure actually goes UP. SUPER pressure, in fact. So, I don\u2019t see that weakening at all. I better go eat some canned chicken.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And when I see five named storms all forecast to head in every direction possible EXCEPT Florida, I think, \u201cI bet their algorithm is all screwed up and really \u2026 WE\u2019RE IN THE BULLSEYE OF ALL FIVE!!! I better buy more chicken.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Now, some of you more \u201clearned\u201d Floridians will inevitably think: \u201cThis guy\u2019s an idiot! And his sodium levels are going to be through the roof if he eats all that chicken.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But I\u2019ll have you know I\u2019m doing you a favor with all my predictions and ruining the odds of a Florida strike. You\u2019re welcome! And you could do us all a favor by joining in and making your own predictions of imminent landfall.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
By all means, though: Whatever you do, don\u2019t jinx it. Don\u2019t believe we\u2019re going to be in the clear. Don\u2019t even think we\u2019re going to dodge the bullet this year. Because that is exactly when frat-boy Delta-Epsilon-Gamma sneaks up on us and carries away all of our canned chicken. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Don\u2019t jinx it. <\/p>\n
Whatever you do, DO NOT jinx it. Because for large parts of Florida, it\u2019s going pretty well. In a record hurricane season like no other, so far we are doing pretty \u2026 NO! Don\u2019t think it. Don\u2019t say it. Don\u2019t write it. <\/p>\n
It\u2019s not going pretty well. It\u2019s going terrible. We\u2019re literally running out of storm names. The say we start using the Greek alphabet if we run through all the names. Which is crazy because who even knew the Greeks had their own alphabet? And when was the last time Greece was even threatened by a tropical cyclone? So, where do they get off getting to name our storms with their letters? That\u2019s crazy! <\/p>\n
Personally, I think the areas most-at-risk should be allowed to do a write-in campaign to name them. Then we can get some really good names like: Little Swirly, \u2018Ole Crooked Tail or The One That Licked Us. How about \u201cTiger Chomp?\u201d Man, that would be good, wouldn\u2019t it? I would take a Tiger Chomp over a Vicky or a Zeta. Besides, Greek alphabet-named storms are going to sound like a bad frat party in the Atlantic. <\/p>\n
OK, back on topic: Don\u2019t jinx it. Don\u2019t let it creep into your mind. Don\u2019t think we\u2019re in the clear. Don\u2019t you dare say, \u201cmaybe none are going to hit us this year.\u201d Ugh! I feel sick even typing that. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[576,558,569],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2138","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-2020-nutshells","category-florida","category-weather"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2138","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2138"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2138\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2139,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2138\/revisions\/2139"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2138"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2138"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2138"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}