It\u2019s remarkable what technology can teach us about ourselves, especially when it all goes wrong. When we\u2019re at our lowest. The lowest of the lows. Down deep in that great digital pit of despair. Drowning in bits and gigs and bandwidth and lots of other strange names that you know guys with goofy eyeglasses once came up with: \u201cYeah, this will mess with their minds. Let\u2019s call it a \u2018Flamingshnagel!\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I hate those guys!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I learned a lot about myself this past week after my daughter permanently locked herself out of her iPhone by accident \u2013 yes, you read that right — and then the Phantom of the Modem wreaked WIFI havoc and killed our Internet. Lowest \u2026 of \u2026 the \u2026 lows! Two tech trials that tested my mettle and gave me a glimpse at who I REALLY am. It was ugly, and here is what I learned:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2022 I\u2019m really bad at spinning bad news. When my daughter locked herself out of her phone after changing her passcode, but mis-remembered the number, she went on to exceed the number of tries Apple allows you before they lock you out completely. It\u2019s a security technique that doubles as cruel torture for teens. But no worries. All you have to do is reset the phone and then restore it to the most recent backup. You know, when you last plugged it into a computer to save all of those precious images, files, contacts and settings? You know, the thing you\u2019re supposed to do at least monthly? You know \u2026 you did do that, right? Because if you don\u2019t, you\u2019ll have no choice but to deliver this kind of report to a distraught 15-year-old: \u201cSo, the good news is, I was able to find a backup. Pretty good news, yeah? Pretty impressed with myself. Now, in ever-slightly worse news \u2026 uh \u2026 it\u2019s a backup from 2017. But \u2026 BUT, that\u2019s better than 2015, right?\u201d No good way to sugarcoat that one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2022 I\u2019m not good under pressure. After working on her phone for hours, and then realizing not only was I making no progress, but potentially making things worse, I broke into cold sweats, became delusional and started screaming, \u201cWE\u2019RE GONNA DIE! WE\u2019RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!\u201d Someone threw a bucket of water on me and set me straight by shouting, \u201cGet it together, man, and fix my phone!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2022 I really don\u2019t know what I\u2019m doing. I might think I do. I might convince myself of that fact. But I\u2019m one good step away from getting locking out of my own phone pretty much every other day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2022 15-year-olds desperately need their phones and\/or WIFI. Take away either (God forbid around the same time!) and they are reduced to \u2026 well \u2026 folks who you can carry on an actual cogent conversation with. In fact, without the safety blanket of a phone or computer to monopolize their attention, you can learn all kinds of things. Like, for instance, their eyes do actually look up and make contact with yours. I didn\u2019t even know what color her eyes were before last week.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2022 Snapping, \u201cUnacceptable!\u201d at a cable\/internet customer service rep on the phone may sound ridiculous and like something fuddy-duddy from the 1930s, but \u2026 it works!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2022 I will believe anything I read on the internet. The more far-fetched and ridiculous the solution, the more I\u2019m likely to try it. Especially when I\u2019m desperate and out of ideas. Talk sweetly to the phone to convince it to accept the passcode? OK, sure. Put it in the oven at 375 degrees with a sprig of rosemary and a sprinkle of lemon? At this point, what do I have to lose? Offer $1 million to Russian hackers found on the Dark Web who promise to also uncover government secrets in your daughter\u2019s videos of the cat snuggling with the dog? You know, I could actually see that as possible!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2022 I will do just about anything to help my daughter. I will stay up late into the night. I will scour the infinite depths of my computer looking for lost backups. I will scream \u201cUnacceptable!\u201d at a cable service rep so she can get one of her online assignments in. And I will feel incredibly horrible when I don\u2019t come through and fix it all \u2013 what I have always seen as my real mission in life. Because, isn\u2019t that what dads do? In the end, I did get the phone back to its mid-2020 setup, and a new modem broadcasting bits and flamingshnagels all over the house. I even got a cogent conversation with a little eye contact, which was maybe the biggest win of all.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It\u2019s remarkable what technology can teach us about ourselves, especially when it all goes wrong. When we\u2019re at our lowest. The lowest of the lows. Down deep in that great digital pit of despair. Drowning in bits and gigs and bandwidth and lots of other strange names that you know guys with goofy eyeglasses once came up with: \u201cYeah, this will mess with their minds. Let\u2019s call it a \u2018Flamingshnagel!\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n
I hate those guys!<\/p>\n
I learned a lot about myself this past week after my daughter permanently locked herself out of her iPhone by accident \u2013 yes, you read that right — and then the Phantom of the Modem wreaked WIFI havoc and killed our Internet. Lowest \u2026 of \u2026 the \u2026 lows! Two tech trials that tested my mettle and gave me a glimpse at who I REALLY am. It was ugly, and here is what I learned: <\/p>\n
\u2022 I\u2019m really bad at spinning bad news. When my daughter locked herself out of her phone after changing her passcode, but mis-remembered the number, she went on to exceed the number of tries Apple allows you before they lock you out completely. It\u2019s a security technique that doubles as cruel torture for teens. But no worries. All you have to do is reset the phone and then restore it to the most recent backup. You know, when you last plugged it into a computer to save all of those precious images, files, contacts and settings? You know, the thing you\u2019re supposed to do at least monthly? You know \u2026 you did do that, right? Because if you don\u2019t, you\u2019ll have no choice but to deliver this kind of report to a distraught 15-year-old: \u201cSo, the good news is, I was able to find a backup. Pretty good news, yeah? Pretty impressed with myself. Now, in ever-slightly worse news \u2026 uh \u2026 it\u2019s a backup from 2017. But \u2026 BUT, that\u2019s better than 2015, right?\u201d No good way to sugarcoat that one. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[578,561,8,559],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2198","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-2021-nutshells","category-family","category-parenthoodandchildren","category-technology"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2198","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2198"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2198\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2199,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2198\/revisions\/2199"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2198"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2198"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2198"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}