Hey Internet, stop freaking me out! You think that\u2019s cool? It\u2019s not cool. It\u2019s freakin\u2019 \u2026 me \u2026 out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
All kinds of things. Everything you do and say has me worried. You keep publishing stuff. Stuff that is supposed to be helpful. Stuff that is supposed to give guidance and support. Stuff that is supposed to be advice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But it\u2019s all scary as heck! All of it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Investing and financial planning advice. Health advice. Hygiene advice and even the weather. Yeah, the weather. Like how if your zip code drinks too much beer, it\u2019s more likely to attract hurricanes. (OK, I made that one up. But I bet you there\u2019s someone out there who thinks that\u2019s true. And they\u2019ve written a story about it and posted it on the Internet. I\u2019m going to read it and I\u2019m going to FREAK OUT!!!)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I don\u2019t know why, but the financial advice is scaring me the most. Maybe it\u2019s because I\u2019m getting up there in years, but I see a lot more of it now. It\u2019s all terrifying. \u201cThree big 401(k) mistakes you\u2019ll regret in retirement.\u201d \u201cEveryone\u2019s going to be a millionaire \u2026 but you.\u201d \u201cWhy you should give up now because your future is doomed!\u201d \u201cYou could have bought cryptocurrency, but you got tacos instead.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I can\u2019t even sleep at night.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Where are all the articles about how to retire so filthy rich that you just sit around your pool all day drinking pi\u00f1a coladas and saying things like, \u201cPool boy, throw another roll of $100s on the fire\u201d?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Instead, it\u2019s all about how we\u2019re going to BE that pool boy until we\u2019re 87. All because our savings is so anemic, and we really like tacos. Man, I wanted those pi\u00f1a coladas!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
On the health and fitness front it\u2019s no better. This was the actual headline on a story I saw from Sciencefocus.com: \u201cYes, your brain is eating itself all the time. Here’s why.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Did I read it to learn more? Of course not! The headline was horror-movie scary enough. My brain is a cannibal and it\u2019s coming for me. That\u2019s all I needed to know. (Full disclosure: I did kind of suspect it all along.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Or I\u2019ll find articles about how my running, or lack of stretching before running, is going to cause my body to quite suddenly break in half with an ear-shattering snap.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Stories about rare deadly gut parasites, or South American intestinal worms, which eat the gut parasites and then start building condos in your belly. I\u2019ve convinced myself I have them. Never mind that there is almost no way they could have gotten a Visa and made the connecting flights with the way the airports have been recently. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I saw an article about a doctor \u2026 I\u2019m even uncomfortable typing this \u2026 who says you shouldn\u2019t pluck \u2026 OK, give me a moment \u2026 NOSE HAIRS!!! Because \u2026 and I\u2019m not even certain here because I totally blacked out when I read the first paragraph \u2026 something about an infection that could go to your BRAIN!!! This even has my condo-building belly worms freaked out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And you don\u2019t even know what to trust anymore. How to separate out the real from the speculation from the all-out slop. Because, as my column is proving right now, any imbecile can broadcast to the world all kinds of mis-interpreted, over-blown, half-truth theories, conspiracies and exaggerations. Anyone can get on TikTok and start a pandemonium by telling people not to brush their teeth because you could accidentally swallow your toothbrush and choke. So, start gargling with rocks instead! (Disclaimer: All made up \u2026 DO NOT GARGLE WITH ROCKS!!!)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe it\u2019s time to simmer down. To take more things with a grain of salt. Do what I was taught to do as a journalist: Not over-react, fact check, verify sources, make sure it passes the smell test. As the old saying goes: If your mama tells you she loves you, check it out! And never take advice from someone who gargles rocks on TikTok.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe I just need to stop worrying so much. Stop reading the Internet, and putting all of my stock (and faith) into everything I find. Recognize that I (probably) don\u2019t have a South American intestinal worm inside me, and that since I don\u2019t like pi\u00f1a coladas anyway, what does it matter if I\u2019m serving or drinking them. Besides, my brain will have eaten itself long before that comes to pass.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Hey Internet, stop freaking me out! You think that\u2019s cool? It\u2019s not cool. It\u2019s freakin\u2019 \u2026 me \u2026 out. <\/p>\n
All kinds of things. Everything you do and say has me worried. You keep publishing stuff. Stuff that is supposed to be helpful. Stuff that is supposed to give guidance and support. Stuff that is supposed to be advice. <\/p>\n
But it\u2019s all scary as heck! All of it. <\/p>\n
Investing and financial planning advice. Health advice. Hygiene advice and even the weather. Yeah, the weather. Like how if your zip code drinks too much beer, it\u2019s more likely to attract hurricanes. (OK, I made that one up. But I bet you there\u2019s someone out there who thinks that\u2019s true. And they\u2019ve written a story about it and posted it on the Internet. I\u2019m going to read it and I\u2019m going to FREAK OUT!!!)<\/p>\n
I don\u2019t know why, but the financial advice is scaring me the most. Maybe it\u2019s because I\u2019m getting up there in years, but I see a lot more of it now. It\u2019s all terrifying. \u201cThree big 401(k) mistakes you\u2019ll regret in retirement.\u201d \u201cEveryone\u2019s going to be a millionaire \u2026 but you.\u201d \u201cWhy you should give up now because your future is doomed!\u201d \u201cYou could have bought cryptocurrency, but you got tacos instead.\u201d <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[578,574,572],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2291","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-2021-nutshells","category-health","category-in-the-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2291","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2291"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2291\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2292,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2291\/revisions\/2292"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2291"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2291"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nutshellcity.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2291"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}