It seems unusual this early in fall to be basking in such glorious weather. Kind of chilly in the morning. Low 80s in the middle of the day. What is this New England? It’s what we Floridians dream about! A mild, early fall that makes us consider putting away flip-flops and trying on loafers.
But remember, people. We’re Floridians. Be careful. We’re not used to this kind of weather. An early fall should also come with a few warnings on how to successfully navigate it so you not only enjoy it, but also exercise
• Be careful not to walk into traffic while admiring the glorious weather. It’s been known to happen. Low 80s and even upper 70s degree weather makes Floridians a bit delirious. Giddy with delight. We walk around stupefied saying really absurd things like, “Doesn’t the air feel like cashmere!” And then, oblivious, we walk right into a moving taxi cab.
• Remember: It could be a fall mirage. Enjoy it, yes. But 90-degree weather could be lurking around the corner. Don’t put away your summer clothes just yet. Wait a little while before digging out your winter garments.
• Don’t start wearing jackets. There are lots of northerners around who will point and laugh.
• Be careful not to overdose on fall soups. This can happen. It’s a little known danger, especially for Floridians. Nice weather comes around and something in our DNA makes us want to make hearty soups — pumpkin, asparagus. Rich, thick, creamy soups served in ginormous bowls with pieces of bread the size of an elephant’s leg.
• Don’t put pumpkin and/or spices in everything you eat or drink. Show some moderation! (And certainly not in your beer.)
• Know that grocery stores put out Halloween candy this early because they know you will buy it, and they also know that you will eat it. You will eat it all, weeks in advance. And then you will need to buy more because you’re now hooked on candy corn and Hershey’s Kisses and eating Snickers bars in the middle of the night. It’s a slippery slope buying candy this early.
• Yes, your child is going to want the pumpkin that is the size of a European car. But tell your child the truth: Your poor porch can’t support that much weight. And you know you’ll throw your back out just picking it up. Plus, think of all the pumpkin “guts” you’re going to have to scoop out of that thing. You think that kid is going to help with that nauseating experience. Just say, “no” and get a nice one the size of a softball.
• Beware the urge to start listening to Christmas music. Come on, people, it’s just too early!
• Know that the water temperature in the ocean has probably dropped a few degrees.
• Enjoy it. Savor it. Suck it all in. Because if there’s one thing we know about seasons in Florida it’s this: They’re known to last about 22 seconds. So