To buy a first aid kit, or not to buy a first aid kit? That is the question. The eternal question.
I mean, what would it say about me?
No longer will I be the kind of dad who when faced with a child sporting a bleeding wound tears off a sheet of paper and says, “Here! Hold this on it until the bleeding stops.”
That’s fatherhood at its best right there. (Forget whether it’s hygienic.)
But if I buy this travel first aid kit, I will suddenly be prepared and ready for all calamity in a smart, reasonable and remarkably mature way. Is that who I am?
My family is heading to Colorado soon. The mountains! We plan to do a lot of hiking and outdoorsy stuff, which has me thinking about all the essentials to bring. The things I could potentially need. And the things I just want an excuse to buy: Like the knife that Indiana Jones had. Imagine explaining that one to airport security!
We’re not doing any major hiking — mainly day hikes. But it’s Colorado, and the outdoors are the outdoors. So I’ve been reading guides and Web sites that tell you things you might need. Like a bear whistle. I’ve never been sure: Does this call a bear to you, so you can get a better look, or scare him away?
I used to do a lot of overnight hiking in the Rockies as a kid with my dad and brother, so it has me hooked on getting all the things I would have loved when I was younger.
Like these “tactical” Army flashlights that I’ve seen so much about. I saw one advertised as putting out not just light, but “brilliant” light. It’s light that can actually make you smarter! I’m getting two of those.
How about a compass? Nothing says outdoorsman quite like standing atop a rocky precipice with a compass planted in your hand while you mumble to yourself, “What do you mean it doesn’t tell me where the car is? What good is knowing north?!?”
Or an emergency blanket. In case the fireplace back in the rental house stops working. Might need to snuggle while watching Netflix. Or some emergency flares. Or an emergency mirror … because you never know when you might have Romaine lettuce in your teeth. (Hey, it happens in the wilderness, too.)
Or a fire starter kit. Ooooh, a fire starter kit. I used to love these as a kid. Some refer to them by their technical name: “matches.” Always good to have if your tactical flashlight stops being brilliant and you haven’t found your car. You might just need to wave one in front of a charging bear, especially if your wife won’t let you buy that Indiana Jones knife.